Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Sunday, June 02, 2013
Value of Money
We all understand and appreciate the value of money. But, money means different things to different people.
For me it is just a means to some specific ends. In that sense, money is important and valuable.
But, is it more valuable than relations? Can money be actually a reason for losing relations?
This I believe, is a very personal assessment.
There was a time when I would be aghast when someone would let a relation go by, not money. Over a period of time I accepted the fact that different people have different needs and point of view.
I derive my security from being me, someone derives it by having their loved ones around them and some by possessing money.
We all have heard that we don't take anything with us, all we would have in the end is the relations we have formed. The ones who value money generally have the opinion that if I have money I will have people around me. After all, like attracts like. Moreover, who has seen what happens after death.
Different point of views. I am happy with mine but it does not give me the right to force my point of view on any one else.
For me, money is valuable but relations are priceless! No one is asking me to change my point of view, then who am I to ask someone else to be like me!
It is also taught that don't judge anyone. Yet, we invariably end up judging people who value money more!
Why judge? Live & let live!
Saturday, December 01, 2012
Sexual Exploitation, Another Story!
Just a few days after I posted a blog on
Sexual Exploitation at work , I came to know of another story.
Strictly, technically speaking, it is not really sexual exploitation, but more of taking advantage of a situation. But, the point is, any experience with unwanted sexual undertones leave an impact on the woman's mind!
Coming to the story.
Due to the nature of my job, I keep meeting people from various companies. That day was no different and I reached the place of meeting at the designated hour. The lady I had to meet had recently joined and we got talking and hit off well. A meeting which was suppose to be a serious, formal business meeting turned into a fun, a bit of giggly affair between two girls!
The girl in question was really accomplished and I thought was under employed at her current position. So, I voiced my opinion and she suddenly became silent. I was about to apologise as I thought I may have crossed my line when she started talking. She conveyed that she resigned from her last company under not so happy circumstances.
She had become an eye sore for some colleagues (male colleagues) as she was doing well and was good at her work. Two male colleagues in her team took her performance a bit personally and started harassing her. Unnecessary snide remarks were made which made life difficult for her.
She complained to the manager but in vain. The manager was very pally to one of the two colleagues so shielded them and told this girl that she is imagining things. The male colleagues continued to be non-cooperative and made sexually loaded comments. This started affecting her performance and her morale. Her manager gave her a bad appraisal based on her performance of last 2-3 months. Her performance for the better part of the year was ignored as if it never existed. To make things worse, out of the two colleagues who were harassing her was promoted and she was asked to report to him. He actually had the guts to come to her and say, 'Let's forget the past and work together to be the best team in the company'. She realised that if she worked well, she can continue to be a star performer but that would also mean that the male colleague would gain & get credit as he heads the team. If she doesn't do well, she may face more such situations. Hence, she quit!
It may not have seemed like a good decision then but it all turned out well for her in the end and today she is doing very well for herself.
My point here is, she is getting what she deserved now where as it should have come to her earlier. Due to a sick mind she had to lose out on something which was truly hers!
Sexual Exploitation at work , I came to know of another story.
Strictly, technically speaking, it is not really sexual exploitation, but more of taking advantage of a situation. But, the point is, any experience with unwanted sexual undertones leave an impact on the woman's mind!
Coming to the story.
Due to the nature of my job, I keep meeting people from various companies. That day was no different and I reached the place of meeting at the designated hour. The lady I had to meet had recently joined and we got talking and hit off well. A meeting which was suppose to be a serious, formal business meeting turned into a fun, a bit of giggly affair between two girls!
The girl in question was really accomplished and I thought was under employed at her current position. So, I voiced my opinion and she suddenly became silent. I was about to apologise as I thought I may have crossed my line when she started talking. She conveyed that she resigned from her last company under not so happy circumstances.
She had become an eye sore for some colleagues (male colleagues) as she was doing well and was good at her work. Two male colleagues in her team took her performance a bit personally and started harassing her. Unnecessary snide remarks were made which made life difficult for her.
She complained to the manager but in vain. The manager was very pally to one of the two colleagues so shielded them and told this girl that she is imagining things. The male colleagues continued to be non-cooperative and made sexually loaded comments. This started affecting her performance and her morale. Her manager gave her a bad appraisal based on her performance of last 2-3 months. Her performance for the better part of the year was ignored as if it never existed. To make things worse, out of the two colleagues who were harassing her was promoted and she was asked to report to him. He actually had the guts to come to her and say, 'Let's forget the past and work together to be the best team in the company'. She realised that if she worked well, she can continue to be a star performer but that would also mean that the male colleague would gain & get credit as he heads the team. If she doesn't do well, she may face more such situations. Hence, she quit!
It may not have seemed like a good decision then but it all turned out well for her in the end and today she is doing very well for herself.
My point here is, she is getting what she deserved now where as it should have come to her earlier. Due to a sick mind she had to lose out on something which was truly hers!
Friday, July 02, 2010
Sexual exploitation @ work
Women across the world are familiar with this.
Many have had first hand experience & the lucky few have just heard stories. Sometimes, life throws you in tricky situations yet gets you out scratch free.
Recently, I came across the story of a girl who had a brush with sexual exploitation.
The story goes....
Anamika had recently joined the corporate world after her MBA. Like every other enthusiastic fresher, she plunged into the new world with full vigour & excitement.
Her job was client servicing & business development.
She, within few months had impressed her seniors with her diligence & work. Therefore, to encourage her & to use her potential to the maximum, the company gave her a very prestigious client to handle. All was going smooth & things were looking up for her.
One fine day she managed to get a big project from the high profile client. The head of operations at the client end seemed to be a nice & helpful person. He was very encouraging & that gave Anamika more confidence to push her companies case infront of the head operations. Anamika's hard work & diligence paid & she got the project. Her happiness knew no bounds.
But, the happiness was short lived. The coordination involved in the new project was very complicated & tiresome. Suddenly the client seemed non-cooperative. The client pre-poned the deadline of delivery & that put lot of stress on Anamika & her company.
With the help of the seniors in her company she devised a plan to workout the whole thing & deliver the project by the preponed deadline. The head of operations at the client end was kept in loop. Anamika had to go for an important meeting in relation to the project and that is when the head operations offered his help & said that he would accompany her to the meeting. This was a big help for Anamika as a man with so many years of experience would always add weight to her case.
The place of meeting was almost at the outskirts of the city, so, the head of operations conveyed that he would pick her up & they could go together in his car for the meeting.
At the designated time the head of operations picked her up and they set out to a long drive to the place of meeting.
Anamika was by now used to the constant frown & disapproving look from the head of operation but was in for a surprise today. She felt a sense of relief to see the smiling & chatty mood of the Head of operation.
The head of operation started asking Anamika about her life in the city & her background. Slowly his questions turned more personal and he started questioning her about her 'close' friends, boyfriends, her take on physical intimacy etc. She started getting very uncomfortable about the discussion but was unable to find a way to change the topic or express her discomfort/displeasure. Her non-decisiveness encouraged him further & he started talking about him & her and telling her that they should become 'closer' friends. He went on to add that he likes talking to her & would continue to 'help' her if she would agree to be his 'friend'.
She was getting confused, for she believed that friendship cannot happen through a deal, if one is destined to be friends they become friends.
While Anamika was confused and tried to make sense of the whole thing, the head of operation tried to reach her and hold her hand. She managed to dodge him. She was now feeling scared as now she was able to understand what this man meant. She opened her mouth to clarify the 'misunderstanding' and he immediately interrupted her and asked her to speak only in English and not to make sudden movement like she had done to dodge him. After all the driver could see and he would understand if she spoke in Hindi. Aah! The driver. Anamika suddenly felt a bit relieved. This man would not attempt anything till the driver was around, after all the head of operations was married with kids.. He had a 'reputation' to 'protect'.
With this knowledge she became a bit bold and managed to keep the head of operations at bay. Once they reached the place of meeting, she felt more confident & secure and had a plan in place. When the head of operations was not looking, she called one of her friends asking her to call her back exactly in 30 mins.
When the friend called back she posed as if something has gone horribly wrong at another place where a part of the work of the same client was being carried out. So, she requested the head of operations to 'tackle' the rest of the meeting here & that she needs to rush to the other place immediately. The head of operations had no option but to fall in line with her plan.
She ran from the place like she had just seen a ghost and thanked God for sending the driver as an angel whose presence helped her come out of the situation unscratched and wiser.
Through the rest of the execution of the order she managed to maintain a safe distance from the head of operation or meet him only when there were more people around.
Once the project got over, she unofficially spoke to her boss about the whole thing. The boss immediately understood her problem and moved her away from the account. Yes, she lost a very prestigious account but her santity and respect was more important.
What saddened me in this whole story was that Anamika had to be penalised without any fault of her. The whole incident was so situational that no one could actually make a complain about the head of operation. He went Scot free, free to harass some other innocent girl!
A girl when she works hard to rise in her career there are such people she has to encounter who are ready to pull her down or if she does not want to give up, she needs to go through them. So very unfair. Will this ever change, I wonder!
Many have had first hand experience & the lucky few have just heard stories. Sometimes, life throws you in tricky situations yet gets you out scratch free.
Recently, I came across the story of a girl who had a brush with sexual exploitation.
The story goes....
Anamika had recently joined the corporate world after her MBA. Like every other enthusiastic fresher, she plunged into the new world with full vigour & excitement.
Her job was client servicing & business development.
She, within few months had impressed her seniors with her diligence & work. Therefore, to encourage her & to use her potential to the maximum, the company gave her a very prestigious client to handle. All was going smooth & things were looking up for her.
One fine day she managed to get a big project from the high profile client. The head of operations at the client end seemed to be a nice & helpful person. He was very encouraging & that gave Anamika more confidence to push her companies case infront of the head operations. Anamika's hard work & diligence paid & she got the project. Her happiness knew no bounds.
But, the happiness was short lived. The coordination involved in the new project was very complicated & tiresome. Suddenly the client seemed non-cooperative. The client pre-poned the deadline of delivery & that put lot of stress on Anamika & her company.
With the help of the seniors in her company she devised a plan to workout the whole thing & deliver the project by the preponed deadline. The head of operations at the client end was kept in loop. Anamika had to go for an important meeting in relation to the project and that is when the head operations offered his help & said that he would accompany her to the meeting. This was a big help for Anamika as a man with so many years of experience would always add weight to her case.
The place of meeting was almost at the outskirts of the city, so, the head of operations conveyed that he would pick her up & they could go together in his car for the meeting.
At the designated time the head of operations picked her up and they set out to a long drive to the place of meeting.
Anamika was by now used to the constant frown & disapproving look from the head of operation but was in for a surprise today. She felt a sense of relief to see the smiling & chatty mood of the Head of operation.
The head of operation started asking Anamika about her life in the city & her background. Slowly his questions turned more personal and he started questioning her about her 'close' friends, boyfriends, her take on physical intimacy etc. She started getting very uncomfortable about the discussion but was unable to find a way to change the topic or express her discomfort/displeasure. Her non-decisiveness encouraged him further & he started talking about him & her and telling her that they should become 'closer' friends. He went on to add that he likes talking to her & would continue to 'help' her if she would agree to be his 'friend'.
She was getting confused, for she believed that friendship cannot happen through a deal, if one is destined to be friends they become friends.
While Anamika was confused and tried to make sense of the whole thing, the head of operation tried to reach her and hold her hand. She managed to dodge him. She was now feeling scared as now she was able to understand what this man meant. She opened her mouth to clarify the 'misunderstanding' and he immediately interrupted her and asked her to speak only in English and not to make sudden movement like she had done to dodge him. After all the driver could see and he would understand if she spoke in Hindi. Aah! The driver. Anamika suddenly felt a bit relieved. This man would not attempt anything till the driver was around, after all the head of operations was married with kids.. He had a 'reputation' to 'protect'.
With this knowledge she became a bit bold and managed to keep the head of operations at bay. Once they reached the place of meeting, she felt more confident & secure and had a plan in place. When the head of operations was not looking, she called one of her friends asking her to call her back exactly in 30 mins.
When the friend called back she posed as if something has gone horribly wrong at another place where a part of the work of the same client was being carried out. So, she requested the head of operations to 'tackle' the rest of the meeting here & that she needs to rush to the other place immediately. The head of operations had no option but to fall in line with her plan.
She ran from the place like she had just seen a ghost and thanked God for sending the driver as an angel whose presence helped her come out of the situation unscratched and wiser.
Through the rest of the execution of the order she managed to maintain a safe distance from the head of operation or meet him only when there were more people around.
Once the project got over, she unofficially spoke to her boss about the whole thing. The boss immediately understood her problem and moved her away from the account. Yes, she lost a very prestigious account but her santity and respect was more important.
What saddened me in this whole story was that Anamika had to be penalised without any fault of her. The whole incident was so situational that no one could actually make a complain about the head of operation. He went Scot free, free to harass some other innocent girl!
A girl when she works hard to rise in her career there are such people she has to encounter who are ready to pull her down or if she does not want to give up, she needs to go through them. So very unfair. Will this ever change, I wonder!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Past Imperfect!
Past, has most of the time, brought a smile on my face. I cherish my memories of the 'good old days'...
I used to wonder, how will it be, to be able to relive/re-experience the past.
Then came along social networking sites like Orkut & FB.
Soon, there was a flood of know/some-what known faces.
A lot of 'networking' on social networking sites later, I got back in touch with many of my old friends (some foes too, but thats a different story & will come back to it later)... Many, I would have never found, but for the social networking sites.
Many 'conversations' followed. Chats, mails, sms, phone calls... Distance suddenly became immaterial. I entered my past with gay abandmonment, to relive it all over again.....
But, life is all about moving on... The initial euphoria died its own death. The friends remain & will for ever but, the equations have changed.
It is sometime difficult to take in that friends who were so close once, have become aquintence. Some, surface only when it's time to wish on an occassion. Few, don't even do that!
Let's stay in touch, I guess has become the most common, never followed line.
Yet, there is a silver lining.
I used to wonder, how will it be, to be able to relive/re-experience the past.
Then came along social networking sites like Orkut & FB.
Soon, there was a flood of know/some-what known faces.
A lot of 'networking' on social networking sites later, I got back in touch with many of my old friends (some foes too, but thats a different story & will come back to it later)... Many, I would have never found, but for the social networking sites.
Many 'conversations' followed. Chats, mails, sms, phone calls... Distance suddenly became immaterial. I entered my past with gay abandmonment, to relive it all over again.....
But, life is all about moving on... The initial euphoria died its own death. The friends remain & will for ever but, the equations have changed.
It is sometime difficult to take in that friends who were so close once, have become aquintence. Some, surface only when it's time to wish on an occassion. Few, don't even do that!
Let's stay in touch, I guess has become the most common, never followed line.
Yet, there is a silver lining.
Wednesday, March 03, 2010
Whom does Bombay belong to?
'Aamchi Mumbai' is a very old term know to ALL who have ever lived or been to the city called Bombay.
I love the city and have spent some wonderful years living & working in the city. Bombay belongs to me... Most definitely it does.. But some say NO.
Some recent, politically motivated acts have created unnecessary discussions on, whom does Bombay belong to?
I was never good in History but have some basic knowledge in its right place.
So, I know that Bombay was once a clutter of seven islands, disconnected from each other.
The earliest inhabitants of the place were a community called 'Kolis', a fishing community. So, the kolis are the 'original' natives of Bombay & the city is theirs!
During 3rd century BCE, the place was ruled by 'Maurya Empire'. The kingdom originates from Magadh (modern Bihar, eastern Uttar Pradesh and Bengal)with it's capital at Patliputra (modern Patna). So, the next claimants to the city are the very people who are being asked to leave Bombay, the Biharis & UPiets.!. By the way during the Magadh empire, art, culture, development of city as Hindu & budhist centre started to take root.
The city was later taken over by 'Sihara dynasty'. What little I know of the dynasty, points that they originated from Southern part of the country and/or outskirts of present day Maharastra. So, South India has a claim on the city too.
Around 14th Century, the city went under islamic rule, the 'Gujurat Sultanate', with there base in Ahemedabad. During this period the Haji Ali mosque was built. So, Gujurati's have a claim on the city too.
Later, through a treaty, the city came under Portuguese rule & then under English rule. The economic & infrastructural development were the highlights of the city in 19th Century when it was under the British rule. We all our aware of the first railway line laid between Bombay & Thane. This was the period when the foundation of Bombay becoming a business hub was laid. Many business men from Kutch, Sind, Gujurat got attracted to the city. The reclaiming of land from the sea to join the seven island also happened during British rule. So, Britishers have a big role in making the city what it is today.
The presence of Maratha's is noted ONLY during the independence struggle.
Post independence too, Bombay was not part of Maharastra, it was an independent state named Bombay State.
The Government buckled under pressure & in 1960, Bombay became a part of Maharastra.
Considering this background of the city, how can ANYONE claim whom the city belongs to? The whole thing seems as ridiculous as saying that Delhi belongs to UP!
Infact, it would have made perfect sense had the city been left alone as a separate state/UT.
I love the city, it is one of the best place to stay in the country, let's not spoil that. But, is anyone listening?
I love the city and have spent some wonderful years living & working in the city. Bombay belongs to me... Most definitely it does.. But some say NO.
Some recent, politically motivated acts have created unnecessary discussions on, whom does Bombay belong to?
I was never good in History but have some basic knowledge in its right place.
So, I know that Bombay was once a clutter of seven islands, disconnected from each other.
The earliest inhabitants of the place were a community called 'Kolis', a fishing community. So, the kolis are the 'original' natives of Bombay & the city is theirs!
During 3rd century BCE, the place was ruled by 'Maurya Empire'. The kingdom originates from Magadh (modern Bihar, eastern Uttar Pradesh and Bengal)with it's capital at Patliputra (modern Patna). So, the next claimants to the city are the very people who are being asked to leave Bombay, the Biharis & UPiets.!. By the way during the Magadh empire, art, culture, development of city as Hindu & budhist centre started to take root.
The city was later taken over by 'Sihara dynasty'. What little I know of the dynasty, points that they originated from Southern part of the country and/or outskirts of present day Maharastra. So, South India has a claim on the city too.
Around 14th Century, the city went under islamic rule, the 'Gujurat Sultanate', with there base in Ahemedabad. During this period the Haji Ali mosque was built. So, Gujurati's have a claim on the city too.
Later, through a treaty, the city came under Portuguese rule & then under English rule. The economic & infrastructural development were the highlights of the city in 19th Century when it was under the British rule. We all our aware of the first railway line laid between Bombay & Thane. This was the period when the foundation of Bombay becoming a business hub was laid. Many business men from Kutch, Sind, Gujurat got attracted to the city. The reclaiming of land from the sea to join the seven island also happened during British rule. So, Britishers have a big role in making the city what it is today.
The presence of Maratha's is noted ONLY during the independence struggle.
Post independence too, Bombay was not part of Maharastra, it was an independent state named Bombay State.
The Government buckled under pressure & in 1960, Bombay became a part of Maharastra.
Considering this background of the city, how can ANYONE claim whom the city belongs to? The whole thing seems as ridiculous as saying that Delhi belongs to UP!
Infact, it would have made perfect sense had the city been left alone as a separate state/UT.
I love the city, it is one of the best place to stay in the country, let's not spoil that. But, is anyone listening?
Friday, July 10, 2009
Monday, July 06, 2009
Happy & openly Gay
The reason for my happiness has nothing to do with my orientations but the thought behind it & the maturity of the decision.
I don't understand why do we have this urge to control everything, even grown up adults. Are we of the opinion that a person who can run his own business, take care of his family, can become an international success, take many important decision yet need to be policed on some basic desires & wants? Law is a mechanism to keep things civilised and in order, but the extent of the same need to be defined by us.
The high court decision on merit needs to be applauded, damn the fanatics.
The day the decision was passed I chanced to see a panel discussion on TV regarding the decision. One of the panelist, a so called guru seemed perturbed by the court decision and said something to the effect that due to this decision, human race is in danger as all would want to be with a partner of same sex (as if one is getting some special favour or perk by doing so!) and was concerned on the future of the process of reproduction! This sounded so hilarious & it became the joke of the day for me.
My lawyer cousin had come home the other day and among many things we discussed this decision too. He explained the basic crux of Article 377 & I was taken aback by something he said.
As per the article 377 one could be booked in case he/she indulged in three kind of sex viz: Anal, Oral &/or with animal. Further, the it says that the complain can be lodged by third party too. This was a shocker. Physical intimacy is a very person thing & how can law allow & consider it ok for a third person to peep into someones private space! Shouldn't such complainant booked under trespassing!
Strange are the laws of the land!!!!!
In the mean time lets rejoice for this may be just the beginning for the law getting more human! A wish of an eternal optimist!!! :)
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Thursday, July 02, 2009
Emotions............
A chemical 'locha' as per a famous hindi movie or something more...
Why do we feel emotions.. How?????
It's such an interesting topic yet never thought about it till now....
According to Wikipedia....
An emotion is a mental and physiological state associated with a wide variety of feelings, thoughts, and behavior. Emotions are subjective experiences, or experienced from an individual point of view. Emotion is often associated with mood, temperament, personality, and disposition.
Emotions is what we feel.. Right???
Sometimes then, if the same situation/person presents itself infront of us at different times why do we react differently.
There would be many examples where our feelings or emotions were different for a person one day & after sometime without any apperent change in status quo, the feelings changes.
Sometimes you feel a rush of emotions & at other times you are cold. Why?
What happens if an emotion like love is not reciprocated?
It can many times take life. Is emotion that strong chemical 'locha' that it can cause someone to take anothers' or one own selfs' life....
Why is it that on certain days when one gets up, is singing & on another growling at everything coming infront of it!
May be I don't understand emotions atall or 'am completely ruled by it!
Why can't there be a standard for behaviour.. It would make life so simple & easy... Maybe a bit boring too.. But still it may just help!
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Thursday, February 19, 2009
Profession Flaunting......
A very weird phenomenon which I have observed in recent past is flaunting ones profession....
Many have started putting stickers on there vehicle announcing to the world their profession. I am sure many would have noticed & also done this them selves.
This phenomenon (if my memory serves me correctly) was restricted to Government vehicles including Defence (but not personal vehicles of employees) & Doctors few years back.
Government Vehicles used it basically to get priority on road & easy access everywhere without stopping & proving identity. The Doctor sign was more for ready help in a pre - mobile era.
In recent years the trend spread it wings to many more sectors & professions & I find it funny.
Defence: Army, Navy or Air Force pasted on the windscreen or mud guard of two wheeler was done basically due to registration plate. Defence along with certain section of Central govt employees have a highly transferable jobs & they can't change registration numbers of their vehicle every two years so the stickers served the purpose of being not stopped & questioned by traffic cops.
Press: This started as a means to get easy access to the "News". But with the increase in the number of media houses, it has reached such levels that about every 5th Car flaunts a 'PRESS' tag. Anybody who has anything remotely to do with print/electronic/radio media starts using this so called label. I have even seen vendors of these companies (I call them companies n not media houses coz they are just business entities, all of them without exception) who supply just the regular office stationery also use it for their 'perceived' benefit.
Other Professions: Today even a lawyer has a sticker on his vehicle. I do not understand the purpose it would serve. May be I am naive.
Once a colleague told me (about the sticker on her car) that it helps. Helps? I asked. Well, it helps when I drive outside the city especially to my relatives place who are not living in a metro.
Now I get it. You want to flaunt it, it has become a trend & a status symbol of sorts. Actually, flaunt what you are not. Because PRESS has a specific need and use & every person working in Media does not come under the blanket of Press....
25 Things About Me.....
I was tagged to the topic by Anu Di & this is what I came up with..............
1. I still don't know what I wanna do in life.... (I'm a wanderer)
2. I love fantasies & living in dreamland... (No wonder I love sleeping)
3. I have at few occasions beaten up men (read eve teasers) & got away with it everytime.
4. I'm a very straight forward, in your face, simple person, yet many find me very complicated...
5.I love prasing myself & love it even more when people appreciate/compliment me... (I may manage to maintain a straight face but I'm over the moon at that moment)
6. I love acting & do a good job at it.
7. I'm an incorrigible flirt & do a good job at it too.
8. My views on marriage prompt my friends to comment that I'm an old timer who has landed in new age by mistake.
9. I love driving & enjoy my music with it. But I love riding my scooter more.
10. I can go any length for my friends.
11. I wanna participate in rally driving atleast once.
12. I wanna write a book sometime in future (I have many ideas already jumping in my head). I love reading fiction/non fiction too.
13. I am an extremely lazy person & donno how I have typed so much...
14. I'm multifaced, self contradicting personality and believe in Richard Bach's idea of parallel/alternate dimensions...
15. I love to dance & be merry!
16. I hate to take bath everyday but do it anyways!
17. I love to swim, ride bicycle, play Basket ball & watch cricket but have not done it for a long time!!!
18. I have a dark/illegal side but have managed to curb it.
19. I think I have found my soulmate (I thank God for it everyday)
20. I'm exteremely critical of myself & full of self doubt.
21. I'm not as confident & fearless as I potray.
22. I donno english & am very unsure while using the language.
23. I hate questions like, "What is your plan for your future?" (I donno what I would do the next minute!!! Future is out of focus entirely)
24. I love life & try to extract the maximum from each day.
25. I am surprised at myself. I had thought I wouldnot be able to go beyond 10!!!
1. I still don't know what I wanna do in life.... (I'm a wanderer)
2. I love fantasies & living in dreamland... (No wonder I love sleeping)
3. I have at few occasions beaten up men (read eve teasers) & got away with it everytime.
4. I'm a very straight forward, in your face, simple person, yet many find me very complicated...
5.I love prasing myself & love it even more when people appreciate/compliment me... (I may manage to maintain a straight face but I'm over the moon at that moment)
6. I love acting & do a good job at it.
7. I'm an incorrigible flirt & do a good job at it too.
8. My views on marriage prompt my friends to comment that I'm an old timer who has landed in new age by mistake.
9. I love driving & enjoy my music with it. But I love riding my scooter more.
10. I can go any length for my friends.
11. I wanna participate in rally driving atleast once.
12. I wanna write a book sometime in future (I have many ideas already jumping in my head). I love reading fiction/non fiction too.
13. I am an extremely lazy person & donno how I have typed so much...
14. I'm multifaced, self contradicting personality and believe in Richard Bach's idea of parallel/alternate dimensions...
15. I love to dance & be merry!
16. I hate to take bath everyday but do it anyways!
17. I love to swim, ride bicycle, play Basket ball & watch cricket but have not done it for a long time!!!
18. I have a dark/illegal side but have managed to curb it.
19. I think I have found my soulmate (I thank God for it everyday)
20. I'm exteremely critical of myself & full of self doubt.
21. I'm not as confident & fearless as I potray.
22. I donno english & am very unsure while using the language.
23. I hate questions like, "What is your plan for your future?" (I donno what I would do the next minute!!! Future is out of focus entirely)
24. I love life & try to extract the maximum from each day.
25. I am surprised at myself. I had thought I wouldnot be able to go beyond 10!!!
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
The Thoughts
Of late a song has been keeping my mind occupied.
This song is one of my favorite songs and I keep listening to it whenever I can.
This song is one of my favorite songs and I keep listening to it whenever I can.
From the time I heard it for the first time, the song has never failed to amuse me and whenever I have ‘heard’ it again, it has shown me a new side, a new meaning.
The song I am talking about is ‘Main Yeh Soch Kar..’ sung by Mohd. Rafi. I’m reproducing the lyrics of the song here
The song I am talking about is ‘Main Yeh Soch Kar..’ sung by Mohd. Rafi. I’m reproducing the lyrics of the song here
Main Yeh Soch Kar…
Main ye soch kar uske dar se uthaa thaa, ke vo rok legii manaa legii mujhako.
Havaaon mein laharaataa aataa thaa daaman, ke daaman pakar kar bithaa legii mujhako.
Kadam aise andaaz se uth rahe the, ke aavaaz dekar bulaa legii mujhako.
Magar usane rokaa,
na usane manaayaa,
na daaman hii pakadaa,
na mujhako bithaayaa,
na aavaaz hii dii,
na vaapas bulaayaa,
Main aahistaa aahistaa badhataa hii aayaa, yahaan tak ke usase judaa ho gayaa main ...
My first thought (Impulsive)
Wow
Great Lyrics
Poor Guys (as in the couple who went through it)
Then I heard it again. (Feminist)
My thoughts were, what an idiot, what an egoistic chap. Good for the girl, she deserves someone better, someone who loves HER more and not his misplaced ego.
After a gap of few months I heard it again and felt fear. (One Side of The Coin)
The fear of rejection,
The fear of being alone,
The fear of feeling unwanted.
After this I stopped listening to this song.
Then out of the blue, a close friend mentioned it and I heard it again. (The Other Side of The Story)
I got goose bumps.
How would one feel to see the love of their life walking away.
To want to stop him/her but can’t.
To feel used.
Now when I hear it, I feel pity. (The Practical Me)
Pity for people who love someone but can’t communicate.
How can a relation survive where one is hesitant in sharing there thought with the other partner.
If you love someone, the love is unconditional and accepts the partner as is. If this is true then I don’t see any reason why one can’t convey what heart feels.
Well, if you want your partner to understand your unspoken words…. Then I guess, you are asking for too much......
My Mom has a different take on this song...
She showed me another meaning in this song
SACRIFICE.
As per her the lady has purposely decided not to stop the love of her life so that he could go ahead explore the world and conquer what he had set out for.
It's her love for him to set him free to be what he wants to be and if in the bargain she looses the love for ever she would accept that with a smile.....
Must say a very thought provoking interpretation...
The link to the video of the song
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Time Flies
A few days back a small innocent comment made by an old friend triggered a new series of thought and interpretation of life.
Actually, during a small talk with a colleague the name of my friend Vikas came up and I realized that I have not spoken to him since a very long time.
So like a ‘good friend’ I called him at the next available opportunity.
After the regular exchange of accusings for not being in touch, we came to the second phase of the conversation, i.e. updating each other on the latest happenings in our respective lives.
Soon another playful disagreement started and I told him to not speak too much as I know him for over 7 years!
The response from the other end of the telephone line was unexpected, there was complete silence.
I thought that the line had got disconnected but that was not the case so I asked ”Vikas are you there?”.
He said, “I hope you are not joking, are you sure?”
Me, “I didn’t get you. Sure about what?”
He said, “That it is already over 7 years since we first met?”
Now it was my change to be silent and after sometime i.e. after mentally reconfirming the calculations I said, “Yes.”
He then jokingly added, “Do you remember that it used to a task to be able to sit through 1 1/2 hours for a single lecture and today we are so casually saying that 7 years have gone by.”
This comparison hit me hard.
WoW! Really!
Spending those 90 minutes used to be as if we were being tortured and today 7 years of our life has just slipped past.
But, has it slipped past or it has been lived?
A very subjective question.
The answer would most definitely be different for different people but it would be different even for one person when thought taking into consideration various aspects of life.
Some places we could have done very well and maybe at some other places we would have slipped completely.
Maybe career wise one may have achieved a land mark, but has the personal relations kept pace?
There used to be a time (at least in my case) when my friends were the most important thing in my life. Then it was making my career and now my Parents & family.
Are these just phases? Or just one relationship/element of life was placed higher on the pedestal.
I don’t know if I was successful or achieved everything possible in the respective phases of my life.
But I am just sure of one thing.
I had made a personal resolution very young in my life, that I would never regret anything that happened in my past for it was the best choice I made then with the knowledge I had at that time. Regret comes when we start evaluating our past decisions with our present knowledge which is unfair.
There are many things in my life which I wanted to do but didn’t.
But still I guess I am doing fine because I am not done yet.
So there was a time when 1 1/2 hour used to be too much to bear and there is a time when days no not days sometimes weeks and month pass by and we feel that Time Flies.
Actually, during a small talk with a colleague the name of my friend Vikas came up and I realized that I have not spoken to him since a very long time.
So like a ‘good friend’ I called him at the next available opportunity.
After the regular exchange of accusings for not being in touch, we came to the second phase of the conversation, i.e. updating each other on the latest happenings in our respective lives.
Soon another playful disagreement started and I told him to not speak too much as I know him for over 7 years!
The response from the other end of the telephone line was unexpected, there was complete silence.
I thought that the line had got disconnected but that was not the case so I asked ”Vikas are you there?”.
He said, “I hope you are not joking, are you sure?”
Me, “I didn’t get you. Sure about what?”
He said, “That it is already over 7 years since we first met?”
Now it was my change to be silent and after sometime i.e. after mentally reconfirming the calculations I said, “Yes.”
He then jokingly added, “Do you remember that it used to a task to be able to sit through 1 1/2 hours for a single lecture and today we are so casually saying that 7 years have gone by.”
This comparison hit me hard.
WoW! Really!
Spending those 90 minutes used to be as if we were being tortured and today 7 years of our life has just slipped past.
But, has it slipped past or it has been lived?
A very subjective question.
The answer would most definitely be different for different people but it would be different even for one person when thought taking into consideration various aspects of life.
Some places we could have done very well and maybe at some other places we would have slipped completely.
Maybe career wise one may have achieved a land mark, but has the personal relations kept pace?
There used to be a time (at least in my case) when my friends were the most important thing in my life. Then it was making my career and now my Parents & family.
Are these just phases? Or just one relationship/element of life was placed higher on the pedestal.
I don’t know if I was successful or achieved everything possible in the respective phases of my life.
But I am just sure of one thing.
I had made a personal resolution very young in my life, that I would never regret anything that happened in my past for it was the best choice I made then with the knowledge I had at that time. Regret comes when we start evaluating our past decisions with our present knowledge which is unfair.
There are many things in my life which I wanted to do but didn’t.
But still I guess I am doing fine because I am not done yet.
So there was a time when 1 1/2 hour used to be too much to bear and there is a time when days no not days sometimes weeks and month pass by and we feel that Time Flies.
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Black Or White???..... OR is it GREY!!!
The other day I was trying to help bridge a gap between two waring parties but things didn’t go as expected and I ended up in a not so happy situation.
I was asked to take sides!
Yes I was literally asked which team do I belong to?
Difficult question.
Difficult question??? Oh my God! The toughest question one can ever face.
Well, I tried to reason out but was categorically told say Yes or NO.
I only know how I managed to avert the situation…
But that did set me thinking on a new angle
Kitna Sahi Kaha Hai Kisi Ne…
Mein tere saath chal nahin sakta.Raasta bhee badal nahin sakta .Girna padta hai apne kadmon main.Yun to kaanta nikal nahin sakta.Raat kitni bhee saazishen kar le.Chand din mein nikal nahin sakta.Jisko apne pe e'tamaad nahin.Vo kabhee bhee sambhal nahin sakta.Chorna padti hai Zameen apni.Varna ooncha uchal nahin sakta.
Many times in life we reach a stage where things can’t be defined as either black or white.
Many times we prefer not to define life in these two brackets.
Certain emotions like love, for anyone, human, animals or even a ‘Biologically’ non living object lead us to such confusions. But, why does confusion arise..
If I Close my eyes and try to visualize confusion, I can see lots of dust particles, smoke etc moving around in the air… Something similar to when, say for example, two cars collide!
Yes, collision leads to confusion.
Confusion of who is right and who is not,
Confusion of who is wronged and who is not,
Confusion of who is to be blamed and who is not.
Life throws same situation infront of all of us in different forms.
It all boils down to the point of view.
A situation stuck me.
When I was not as old I am now, I used to either commute on foot or my bicycle. I used to sometimes get very irritated on the four wheel drivers and used to think all of them just want to crush us under there vehicle’s tyre and think that they rule the roads.
A Point of view. I don’t see anything wrong with it.
Coming to today when I am as old as I am, I travel either on my scooter or car. I still get irritated but on the pedestrian trying to cross the road, or the bicycle guy who came infront of my car the other day. I feel that these people don’t know how to walk on a street or have come out because they want to commit suicide.
Another Point of View. I don’t see anything wrong with it either.
But now if these point of views collide, the same question, who is right?
The point is noone is right and both are.
This is what I call the grey area in life where no distinct Black or White exist.
Today, I can say this so calmly because I am sitting with a cool mind infront of my PC typing my thoughts with no one to disturb me… But when you are caught with other minds around you trying to influence you is it possible to maintain the same calmness???
I donno! The answer, depends again, Grey!!!
I was asked to take sides!
Yes I was literally asked which team do I belong to?
Difficult question.
Difficult question??? Oh my God! The toughest question one can ever face.
Well, I tried to reason out but was categorically told say Yes or NO.
I only know how I managed to avert the situation…
But that did set me thinking on a new angle
Kitna Sahi Kaha Hai Kisi Ne…
Mein tere saath chal nahin sakta.Raasta bhee badal nahin sakta .Girna padta hai apne kadmon main.Yun to kaanta nikal nahin sakta.Raat kitni bhee saazishen kar le.Chand din mein nikal nahin sakta.Jisko apne pe e'tamaad nahin.Vo kabhee bhee sambhal nahin sakta.Chorna padti hai Zameen apni.Varna ooncha uchal nahin sakta.
Many times in life we reach a stage where things can’t be defined as either black or white.
Many times we prefer not to define life in these two brackets.
Certain emotions like love, for anyone, human, animals or even a ‘Biologically’ non living object lead us to such confusions. But, why does confusion arise..
If I Close my eyes and try to visualize confusion, I can see lots of dust particles, smoke etc moving around in the air… Something similar to when, say for example, two cars collide!
Yes, collision leads to confusion.
Confusion of who is right and who is not,
Confusion of who is wronged and who is not,
Confusion of who is to be blamed and who is not.
Life throws same situation infront of all of us in different forms.
It all boils down to the point of view.
A situation stuck me.
When I was not as old I am now, I used to either commute on foot or my bicycle. I used to sometimes get very irritated on the four wheel drivers and used to think all of them just want to crush us under there vehicle’s tyre and think that they rule the roads.
A Point of view. I don’t see anything wrong with it.
Coming to today when I am as old as I am, I travel either on my scooter or car. I still get irritated but on the pedestrian trying to cross the road, or the bicycle guy who came infront of my car the other day. I feel that these people don’t know how to walk on a street or have come out because they want to commit suicide.
Another Point of View. I don’t see anything wrong with it either.
But now if these point of views collide, the same question, who is right?
The point is noone is right and both are.
This is what I call the grey area in life where no distinct Black or White exist.
Today, I can say this so calmly because I am sitting with a cool mind infront of my PC typing my thoughts with no one to disturb me… But when you are caught with other minds around you trying to influence you is it possible to maintain the same calmness???
I donno! The answer, depends again, Grey!!!
Saturday, April 15, 2006
Filhaal....
Aye Zindagi yeh lamha jee lene de...
Pehle se likha kuch bhi nahi...
Roz naya kuch likhti hai tu...
Jo bhi likha hai dil se jiya hai...
yeh lamha filhaal jee lene de....
Yes... trying to live my life by the minute like this song....
The reason i like this song very much is that I usually dont crib.. yes the unknown make me insecure but the fear of unknown also has its own sweetness and thats what keeps me going most of the time....
But sometimes one feels that you need some stability in life.... I am a nomad.. Unattached... a wanderer.. I do what i feel like and when i feel like with noone to stop me.. I am so comfortable being with myself that I dont feel the need to be with anyone... But sometimes it scares me.... I am too independent for the comfort of people around me.... I guess man has this basic instinct to take care of others and feel that the whole worlds responsibility is on there shoulder and when they meet someone who visibly doesnot need any support..it unstables them... I guess thats what is happenning with me.. I come across as extremely independent and self assured person and that makes people uncomfortable.. But I cant purposefully make myself pitiful for others to be comfortable.... I need my space.. Then again the people around me are the people I care for so is it right to just keep living the way I want to????
I know I will live only once but so will they!!!!!
Pehle se likha kuch bhi nahi...
Roz naya kuch likhti hai tu...
Jo bhi likha hai dil se jiya hai...
yeh lamha filhaal jee lene de....
Yes... trying to live my life by the minute like this song....
The reason i like this song very much is that I usually dont crib.. yes the unknown make me insecure but the fear of unknown also has its own sweetness and thats what keeps me going most of the time....
But sometimes one feels that you need some stability in life.... I am a nomad.. Unattached... a wanderer.. I do what i feel like and when i feel like with noone to stop me.. I am so comfortable being with myself that I dont feel the need to be with anyone... But sometimes it scares me.... I am too independent for the comfort of people around me.... I guess man has this basic instinct to take care of others and feel that the whole worlds responsibility is on there shoulder and when they meet someone who visibly doesnot need any support..it unstables them... I guess thats what is happenning with me.. I come across as extremely independent and self assured person and that makes people uncomfortable.. But I cant purposefully make myself pitiful for others to be comfortable.... I need my space.. Then again the people around me are the people I care for so is it right to just keep living the way I want to????
I know I will live only once but so will they!!!!!
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Strange R The Ways of Life
Yes strange......
I had a good day n for a change I was happy somewhere deep down.. that joy which i had forgotten existed....
But then suddenly out of no where another emotion over powered me.... GUILT... yes guilt.... I felt guilty of being happy...A small voice was trying to tell me tht i dont have any right to be happy n that i should stay miserable all my life....
this emotion i cant understand... or maybe i do.. i know like split personality.. i have split brain... one (which i call NOW Brain) with which i do my daily work, interact with people.. and another part ( which I Call Alternate centre or AC) which has got stuck somewhere in time n refuses to come out.. that part keeps pulling me back to my past very moment..even in my sleep.... my AC is not letting me go... even when i am talking to someone the thought process of AC is on.. n when NOW brain is not active obviously AC becomes hyperactive... Today, for a change NOW was able to take me back to my original happy state of mind for few seconds but AC overpowered it ... I sometimes feel tired of this battle I am fighting with myself.... i donno who will win because I would be the loser from both the sides.... so i donno if it matters to me.. but then again is is right to give up so easily to the scars of the past.. i donno....
hope i am able to answer these questions soon..
I had a good day n for a change I was happy somewhere deep down.. that joy which i had forgotten existed....
But then suddenly out of no where another emotion over powered me.... GUILT... yes guilt.... I felt guilty of being happy...A small voice was trying to tell me tht i dont have any right to be happy n that i should stay miserable all my life....
this emotion i cant understand... or maybe i do.. i know like split personality.. i have split brain... one (which i call NOW Brain) with which i do my daily work, interact with people.. and another part ( which I Call Alternate centre or AC) which has got stuck somewhere in time n refuses to come out.. that part keeps pulling me back to my past very moment..even in my sleep.... my AC is not letting me go... even when i am talking to someone the thought process of AC is on.. n when NOW brain is not active obviously AC becomes hyperactive... Today, for a change NOW was able to take me back to my original happy state of mind for few seconds but AC overpowered it ... I sometimes feel tired of this battle I am fighting with myself.... i donno who will win because I would be the loser from both the sides.... so i donno if it matters to me.. but then again is is right to give up so easily to the scars of the past.. i donno....
hope i am able to answer these questions soon..
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Life
It is said that one should plan for future...
But I say why??? Coz life never takes the expected course so if we donno whats gonna happen tomorrow why waste time in planning.. Take life as it comes and believe me my personal life incidents have made me to believe that one can never plan your life.. So now I take life as it comes and live every day as my last day on earth.
Well just hoping that it continues till my actual last day on this earth
But I say why??? Coz life never takes the expected course so if we donno whats gonna happen tomorrow why waste time in planning.. Take life as it comes and believe me my personal life incidents have made me to believe that one can never plan your life.. So now I take life as it comes and live every day as my last day on earth.
Well just hoping that it continues till my actual last day on this earth
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