Just a few days after I posted a blog on
Sexual Exploitation at work , I came to know of another story.
Strictly, technically speaking, it is not really sexual exploitation, but more of taking advantage of a situation. But, the point is, any experience with unwanted sexual undertones leave an impact on the woman's mind!
Coming to the story.
Due to the nature of my job, I keep meeting people from various companies. That day was no different and I reached the place of meeting at the designated hour. The lady I had to meet had recently joined and we got talking and hit off well. A meeting which was suppose to be a serious, formal business meeting turned into a fun, a bit of giggly affair between two girls!
The girl in question was really accomplished and I thought was under employed at her current position.
So, I voiced my opinion and she suddenly became silent. I was about to apologise as I thought I may have crossed my line when she started talking.
She conveyed that she resigned from her last company under not so happy circumstances.
She had become an eye sore for some colleagues (male colleagues) as she was doing well and was good at her work. Two male colleagues in her team took her performance a bit personally and started harassing her. Unnecessary snide remarks were made which made life difficult for her.
She complained to the manager but in vain. The manager was very pally to one of the two colleagues so shielded them and told this girl that she is imagining things.
The male colleagues continued to be non-cooperative and made sexually loaded comments. This started affecting her performance and her morale. Her manager gave her a bad appraisal based on her performance of last 2-3 months. Her performance for the better part of the year was ignored as if it never existed. To make things worse, out of the two colleagues who were harassing her was promoted and she was asked to report to him.
He actually had the guts to come to her and say, 'Let's forget the past and work together to be the best team in the company'. She realised that if she worked well, she can continue to be a star performer but that would also mean that the male colleague would gain & get credit as he heads the team. If she doesn't do well, she may face more such situations.
Hence, she quit!
It may not have seemed like a good decision then but it all turned out well for her in the end and today she is doing very well for herself.
My point here is, she is getting what she deserved now where as it should have come to her earlier. Due to a sick mind she had to lose out on something which was truly hers!
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Saturday, December 01, 2012
Friday, July 02, 2010
Sexual exploitation @ work
Women across the world are familiar with this.
Many have had first hand experience & the lucky few have just heard stories. Sometimes, life throws you in tricky situations yet gets you out scratch free.
Recently, I came across the story of a girl who had a brush with sexual exploitation.
The story goes....
Anamika had recently joined the corporate world after her MBA. Like every other enthusiastic fresher, she plunged into the new world with full vigour & excitement.
Her job was client servicing & business development.
She, within few months had impressed her seniors with her diligence & work. Therefore, to encourage her & to use her potential to the maximum, the company gave her a very prestigious client to handle. All was going smooth & things were looking up for her.
One fine day she managed to get a big project from the high profile client. The head of operations at the client end seemed to be a nice & helpful person. He was very encouraging & that gave Anamika more confidence to push her companies case infront of the head operations. Anamika's hard work & diligence paid & she got the project. Her happiness knew no bounds.
But, the happiness was short lived. The coordination involved in the new project was very complicated & tiresome. Suddenly the client seemed non-cooperative. The client pre-poned the deadline of delivery & that put lot of stress on Anamika & her company.
With the help of the seniors in her company she devised a plan to workout the whole thing & deliver the project by the preponed deadline. The head of operations at the client end was kept in loop. Anamika had to go for an important meeting in relation to the project and that is when the head operations offered his help & said that he would accompany her to the meeting. This was a big help for Anamika as a man with so many years of experience would always add weight to her case.
The place of meeting was almost at the outskirts of the city, so, the head of operations conveyed that he would pick her up & they could go together in his car for the meeting.
At the designated time the head of operations picked her up and they set out to a long drive to the place of meeting.
Anamika was by now used to the constant frown & disapproving look from the head of operation but was in for a surprise today. She felt a sense of relief to see the smiling & chatty mood of the Head of operation.
The head of operation started asking Anamika about her life in the city & her background. Slowly his questions turned more personal and he started questioning her about her 'close' friends, boyfriends, her take on physical intimacy etc. She started getting very uncomfortable about the discussion but was unable to find a way to change the topic or express her discomfort/displeasure. Her non-decisiveness encouraged him further & he started talking about him & her and telling her that they should become 'closer' friends. He went on to add that he likes talking to her & would continue to 'help' her if she would agree to be his 'friend'.
She was getting confused, for she believed that friendship cannot happen through a deal, if one is destined to be friends they become friends.
While Anamika was confused and tried to make sense of the whole thing, the head of operation tried to reach her and hold her hand. She managed to dodge him. She was now feeling scared as now she was able to understand what this man meant. She opened her mouth to clarify the 'misunderstanding' and he immediately interrupted her and asked her to speak only in English and not to make sudden movement like she had done to dodge him. After all the driver could see and he would understand if she spoke in Hindi. Aah! The driver. Anamika suddenly felt a bit relieved. This man would not attempt anything till the driver was around, after all the head of operations was married with kids.. He had a 'reputation' to 'protect'.
With this knowledge she became a bit bold and managed to keep the head of operations at bay. Once they reached the place of meeting, she felt more confident & secure and had a plan in place. When the head of operations was not looking, she called one of her friends asking her to call her back exactly in 30 mins.
When the friend called back she posed as if something has gone horribly wrong at another place where a part of the work of the same client was being carried out. So, she requested the head of operations to 'tackle' the rest of the meeting here & that she needs to rush to the other place immediately. The head of operations had no option but to fall in line with her plan.
She ran from the place like she had just seen a ghost and thanked God for sending the driver as an angel whose presence helped her come out of the situation unscratched and wiser.
Through the rest of the execution of the order she managed to maintain a safe distance from the head of operation or meet him only when there were more people around.
Once the project got over, she unofficially spoke to her boss about the whole thing. The boss immediately understood her problem and moved her away from the account. Yes, she lost a very prestigious account but her santity and respect was more important.
What saddened me in this whole story was that Anamika had to be penalised without any fault of her. The whole incident was so situational that no one could actually make a complain about the head of operation. He went Scot free, free to harass some other innocent girl!
A girl when she works hard to rise in her career there are such people she has to encounter who are ready to pull her down or if she does not want to give up, she needs to go through them. So very unfair. Will this ever change, I wonder!
Many have had first hand experience & the lucky few have just heard stories. Sometimes, life throws you in tricky situations yet gets you out scratch free.
Recently, I came across the story of a girl who had a brush with sexual exploitation.
The story goes....
Anamika had recently joined the corporate world after her MBA. Like every other enthusiastic fresher, she plunged into the new world with full vigour & excitement.
Her job was client servicing & business development.
She, within few months had impressed her seniors with her diligence & work. Therefore, to encourage her & to use her potential to the maximum, the company gave her a very prestigious client to handle. All was going smooth & things were looking up for her.
One fine day she managed to get a big project from the high profile client. The head of operations at the client end seemed to be a nice & helpful person. He was very encouraging & that gave Anamika more confidence to push her companies case infront of the head operations. Anamika's hard work & diligence paid & she got the project. Her happiness knew no bounds.
But, the happiness was short lived. The coordination involved in the new project was very complicated & tiresome. Suddenly the client seemed non-cooperative. The client pre-poned the deadline of delivery & that put lot of stress on Anamika & her company.
With the help of the seniors in her company she devised a plan to workout the whole thing & deliver the project by the preponed deadline. The head of operations at the client end was kept in loop. Anamika had to go for an important meeting in relation to the project and that is when the head operations offered his help & said that he would accompany her to the meeting. This was a big help for Anamika as a man with so many years of experience would always add weight to her case.
The place of meeting was almost at the outskirts of the city, so, the head of operations conveyed that he would pick her up & they could go together in his car for the meeting.
At the designated time the head of operations picked her up and they set out to a long drive to the place of meeting.
Anamika was by now used to the constant frown & disapproving look from the head of operation but was in for a surprise today. She felt a sense of relief to see the smiling & chatty mood of the Head of operation.
The head of operation started asking Anamika about her life in the city & her background. Slowly his questions turned more personal and he started questioning her about her 'close' friends, boyfriends, her take on physical intimacy etc. She started getting very uncomfortable about the discussion but was unable to find a way to change the topic or express her discomfort/displeasure. Her non-decisiveness encouraged him further & he started talking about him & her and telling her that they should become 'closer' friends. He went on to add that he likes talking to her & would continue to 'help' her if she would agree to be his 'friend'.
She was getting confused, for she believed that friendship cannot happen through a deal, if one is destined to be friends they become friends.
While Anamika was confused and tried to make sense of the whole thing, the head of operation tried to reach her and hold her hand. She managed to dodge him. She was now feeling scared as now she was able to understand what this man meant. She opened her mouth to clarify the 'misunderstanding' and he immediately interrupted her and asked her to speak only in English and not to make sudden movement like she had done to dodge him. After all the driver could see and he would understand if she spoke in Hindi. Aah! The driver. Anamika suddenly felt a bit relieved. This man would not attempt anything till the driver was around, after all the head of operations was married with kids.. He had a 'reputation' to 'protect'.
With this knowledge she became a bit bold and managed to keep the head of operations at bay. Once they reached the place of meeting, she felt more confident & secure and had a plan in place. When the head of operations was not looking, she called one of her friends asking her to call her back exactly in 30 mins.
When the friend called back she posed as if something has gone horribly wrong at another place where a part of the work of the same client was being carried out. So, she requested the head of operations to 'tackle' the rest of the meeting here & that she needs to rush to the other place immediately. The head of operations had no option but to fall in line with her plan.
She ran from the place like she had just seen a ghost and thanked God for sending the driver as an angel whose presence helped her come out of the situation unscratched and wiser.
Through the rest of the execution of the order she managed to maintain a safe distance from the head of operation or meet him only when there were more people around.
Once the project got over, she unofficially spoke to her boss about the whole thing. The boss immediately understood her problem and moved her away from the account. Yes, she lost a very prestigious account but her santity and respect was more important.
What saddened me in this whole story was that Anamika had to be penalised without any fault of her. The whole incident was so situational that no one could actually make a complain about the head of operation. He went Scot free, free to harass some other innocent girl!
A girl when she works hard to rise in her career there are such people she has to encounter who are ready to pull her down or if she does not want to give up, she needs to go through them. So very unfair. Will this ever change, I wonder!
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Boss
In life one interacts with many different types of people. I believe that no two individuals are same and hence never indulge in comparing people. But there are certain traits, temperaments or views which are similar and that's why we can classify people in various categories.
Though I have a very limited experience of corporate life and have a long long way to go before I start forming opinions about people. But this is one community I just can't resist talking about....... Bosses.
Boss is someone you can never ignore. You may not be spending your maximum time in office with this individual but still he/she is in your mind constantly. The reason of the presence of your boss in your thoughts vary and it varies b'coz of the kind of person you are and also on the type of Boss you have.
I am enlisting the types of Bosses I have had the experience to work with or see around me.
1. Insecure Boss: This type of gentlemen/ladies are either dumb (can't help it) or are under confident. The moment they see a smart, intelligent and bright executive there defence mechanisms starts working overtime and in certain case all armour in their kitty comes blazing out. Poor executive... never knows what hit him/her!
2. Workaholic Boss: A person who does not have a personal life of his/her own and thinks that no one in the world has the right to have one. These types expect you to be in office (or on duty) all the time irrespective of the load of work one has. This type thinks that by employing you he/she has made you a slave and you would work as per his/her wimps and fancies; take no leave and even work on official holidays. He/she tends to make a face even if you by mistake mention the word 'Home'.
3. Scheming & Manipulative Boss: If your boss is against you, be rest assured you can never grow or prosper under him/her. The best is to run from that job as fast as possible. Actually this category is also an off shoot of Insecure boss or could be just a sadist!
4. Instant Boss: This person is always in a hurry and expect things to be done before its uttered. He/she has no patience and is always in a rush. Can get very irritating but is generally nice hearted. He/she will take care of you and respect you as an equal. He/she is extremely focused, motivated & motivating.
5. Motivating Boss: This type of boss is one of the best thing to happen to you at your work place. Actually this type is an extension of Instant Boss minus the impatience.
6. Old Glory Boss: This is the kind of boss who is least interested in knowing or looking forward. He/she tends to live in there 'good old days'. This type if not dealt properly can really hamper your career. But, you get to learn a lot from his/her rich experience.
7. Flirt Boss: These are the types who love to use their power over others. Many use their colleagues by showing them carrot or sometimes get used too. This is one category I absolutely hate!
8. Leader Boss: This type in true sense is the one to be feared the most. He/she believes in leading by example and is generally good at his/her job and very confident. They are visionary and always look at the big picture. To make your self stand tall one has to really work hand, but should be fun as this is healthy competition which can benefit all.
& last but not the least
9. Mentor Boss: A selfless person who believes in passing on his/her learnings'. To have a mentor boss especially at an early phase of ones career can go a long way in your success. This type of a person is generally above the rat race or very influential or extremely efficient with high credentials in the field.
The types mentioned above are the types I have seen in my life. There could be bosses who could be a mixed variety ie one or more traits may be present in one person and they would come out depending upon the situation the person is in.
Good or Bad, whatever the type of boss I have faced, I thank them all in helping me refine my personality and help me reduce my imperfections.
My experience with all my bosses has helped me in the long run. I many times didn't understand it, disliked them, abused them but like my Mentor Boss used to say... Look at the BIG PICTURE. Finally, I have started doing that!!!
Though I have a very limited experience of corporate life and have a long long way to go before I start forming opinions about people. But this is one community I just can't resist talking about....... Bosses.
Boss is someone you can never ignore. You may not be spending your maximum time in office with this individual but still he/she is in your mind constantly. The reason of the presence of your boss in your thoughts vary and it varies b'coz of the kind of person you are and also on the type of Boss you have.
I am enlisting the types of Bosses I have had the experience to work with or see around me.
1. Insecure Boss: This type of gentlemen/ladies are either dumb (can't help it) or are under confident. The moment they see a smart, intelligent and bright executive there defence mechanisms starts working overtime and in certain case all armour in their kitty comes blazing out. Poor executive... never knows what hit him/her!
2. Workaholic Boss: A person who does not have a personal life of his/her own and thinks that no one in the world has the right to have one. These types expect you to be in office (or on duty) all the time irrespective of the load of work one has. This type thinks that by employing you he/she has made you a slave and you would work as per his/her wimps and fancies; take no leave and even work on official holidays. He/she tends to make a face even if you by mistake mention the word 'Home'.
3. Scheming & Manipulative Boss: If your boss is against you, be rest assured you can never grow or prosper under him/her. The best is to run from that job as fast as possible. Actually this category is also an off shoot of Insecure boss or could be just a sadist!
4. Instant Boss: This person is always in a hurry and expect things to be done before its uttered. He/she has no patience and is always in a rush. Can get very irritating but is generally nice hearted. He/she will take care of you and respect you as an equal. He/she is extremely focused, motivated & motivating.
5. Motivating Boss: This type of boss is one of the best thing to happen to you at your work place. Actually this type is an extension of Instant Boss minus the impatience.
6. Old Glory Boss: This is the kind of boss who is least interested in knowing or looking forward. He/she tends to live in there 'good old days'. This type if not dealt properly can really hamper your career. But, you get to learn a lot from his/her rich experience.
7. Flirt Boss: These are the types who love to use their power over others. Many use their colleagues by showing them carrot or sometimes get used too. This is one category I absolutely hate!
8. Leader Boss: This type in true sense is the one to be feared the most. He/she believes in leading by example and is generally good at his/her job and very confident. They are visionary and always look at the big picture. To make your self stand tall one has to really work hand, but should be fun as this is healthy competition which can benefit all.
& last but not the least
9. Mentor Boss: A selfless person who believes in passing on his/her learnings'. To have a mentor boss especially at an early phase of ones career can go a long way in your success. This type of a person is generally above the rat race or very influential or extremely efficient with high credentials in the field.
The types mentioned above are the types I have seen in my life. There could be bosses who could be a mixed variety ie one or more traits may be present in one person and they would come out depending upon the situation the person is in.
Good or Bad, whatever the type of boss I have faced, I thank them all in helping me refine my personality and help me reduce my imperfections.
My experience with all my bosses has helped me in the long run. I many times didn't understand it, disliked them, abused them but like my Mentor Boss used to say... Look at the BIG PICTURE. Finally, I have started doing that!!!
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